The Continuing Adventures Of Your Own Personal Jesus

My New Football Mantra. I pledge allegiance to The Weapon.  Wherever there is an Essendon supporter claiming that they are not drug cheats, I shall scream, “WEAPON!” at them as loudly as I can muster.  Whenever I am at an Essendon game and Super Jobey is near the ball, I shall scream, “WEAPON!” just before I boo him. Whenever Super Joby cries after being booed at a game I shall laugh and scream, “WEAPON!!!” along with the words, “DRUG CHEAT!” Whenever an Essendon supporter mentions the Adelaide Crows and their salary cap rort of paying Kurt Tippett an extra $200,000 in Balfours Steak and Onion pies, I shall scream, “DRUG CHEATS!!!!” Whenever an Essendon supporter tells me, “At least we’ve won a premiership this century,” I shall respond, “At least my team DOESN’T TAKE DRUGS YOU FUCKING DRUG CHEATING ARSEHOLES!!” Whenever an Essendon supporter reminds me of what a champion James Hird was, and still is,  I shall sing, “ME ME ME ME ME ME ME DRUG CHEAT!!!” and remind them tha...

Ok, so I’m back.  So what of it?  I was away, now I have returned.  I had no real desire to fire up once again, to open the sluice gates and allow the bile to run free, but public demand – and, in this case I mean three people – has forced my feeble hands into jotting down my own unique brand of thoughts and over inflated opinions.  That’s right, over inflated.  Trust me, just because I, or anyone else for that matter, have an opinion, it doesn’t mean it’s right, nor does it mean that it should be adopted as the gospel truth.  And if you don’t like that then fuck off right now and save us both the time and trouble – me the trouble of having to explain myself and you the time of having to wade through my bullshit in the vain hopes that a gem of enlightenment might suddenly pop up like Ron Jeremy’s cock at a porn party.  It ain’t gonna happen.  Nope, not in a heartbeat.  Some people aspire to achieve mediocrity, some never get that far.  I...